Ramblings of an American Madman

Ramblings of an American Madman - Just another Day - just another day in the life of a major league baseball umpire - crouched down behind home plate and the catcher - watching the baseball speed in from the pitcher - making split second decisions of the placement of the ball as it travels at you - Strike? Ball? - really should get over that fear of getting hit by the pitch - bad habit of closing my eyes at the last second - crap, over half of the calls are pure guesses - maybe I should have been a basketball ref, naw, too much running - wonder if dancing with the stars needs a judge - anyway.

Started the day like most - pouring generous amounts of my favorite liquid straight down my throat - no, not Crown Royal, had to give that up for the betterment of society - I am talking about coffee - and this week our household has been blessed (not like a religious thing) with visitors that are real and truly coffee masters - talk has been of all things coffee - grand time, just grand, thanks T and J! The day progressed along the new reality that is work now - thoughts are moving from work to a long weekend with a promise of great weather - it is all relative though and strictly personal - nice weather to one may not be to another - the same goes for most of life and most of life's situations - take for example - what I consider as a nice evening spent with a good book and a 12 volt battery charger someone else may consider that too tame - had to give up actual flames due to insurance reasons - Allstate has no sense of adventure - besides the battery charger was on sale at Sears for $49.95 and will charge a battery as well!

Yes, I know, I should address my absence from the blogging world - please don't call as my answering machine is full - email if you must but I may not get around to answering all of the questions about my where abouts and how come no new blogs have been submitted for an extended period - let's just say that when the time is right and my attorney allows me to make a statement the mystery will be cleared up - for now I have been advised to not comment about political issues and will not mention Sarah Palin's body parts for fear of having my computer put out of commission by the web monitors - they watch, you know they do!

Big Larry is enjoying the change in weather - he wants to break out his summer Tshirts but is afraid it might be a bit too early - besides, changing from winter to summer wardrobe would require a bath or shower and he just recovered from the soap rash he received when he took his New Year's bath - actually the doctor at the free clinic said the rash may have been transmitted in other fashions and four doses of penicillin finally cleared it up - still, a bath now would throw off his schedule.

The devil speaks in whispered tones, not listening to the response but demanding attention and wanting action. No one will deny a request but few will be able to complete the task. The lucky few will only by degrees receive any comfort. The devil speaks in whispered tones.

This message has been sponsored by a little old lady who only drove her car to church and back...Bye vroom Bye!